The age old question – Are gays born or created? I watched an interesting 60 Minutes documentary a few years ago and was surprised by its findings. I managed to find this documentary and include it in this post. Check it out.
His room is as nice as my daughter’s and she would kill to have those nails!
In this short documentary, they interviewed a pair of identical twins (twins are supposed to share very similar DNAs), which one grew up to be straight and the other gay. If twins share very similar genes and upbringing, grew up in the same environment and given the same choices, how is it that one turned out to be gay and the other straight?
This documentary also shows that you can actually tell a person’s sexual orientation from their mannerisms since young. At a friend’s recent birthday party, a friend remarked at how un-ladylike her daughter was, sprawling all over the floor while she was doing her colouring. Her other daughter however, was sitting very demurely while doing the same thing. And of course, there was my daughter (a.k.a the Drama Queen) who was sitting in the most supermodel-like pose as though she was lounging on some luxurious couch while having her photograph taken. OK, I’m not saying anything about their future, but from what I know about being a mother is that each kid has their own characteristics and it’s pretty hard to force them to be something they’re not. So how can gays be made? If it’s not genes that are responsible for gays, as we can see from the twins, then it has to be hormones. And hormones are in-built. Just like the documentary, I believe everybody’s hormones dictate their sexual orientation. Cos’ you can’t make someone gay. Try telling my homophobic husband to go and have the hots for some guy! I think hell will freeze over before that happens!

“Shiloh is like a little dude. She likes tracksuits, she likes regular suits. She likes to dress like a boy. She wants to be a boy. So we had to cut her hair. She likes to wear boys' everything. She thinks she's one of the brothers.” ~ Angelina Jolie on her tomboyish 4-year old
In comparison, gay men are more unlikely to keep it in than lesbians. Men by nature are more sexually-charged than women. Telling a man to remain a virgin till marriage is as good as asking them to stop breathing. Gay men usually come out sooner as compared to lesbians, who can appear straight for years when they’re actually not. I know of a teenage boy (he has 4 older brothers!) whom the teacher was complaining about the fact that he likes to hug his male schoolmates from behind without any rhyme or reason. Of cos’ the other boys didn’t like that at all and threatened to beat him up. I believe that’s just his gay tendencies acting out and I wouldn’t be surprised if he does come out when he’s older. These acting-outs happen cos’ men are by nature more likely to display their affections as compared to women. Women are not as aggressive and that’s the reason why most women do not approach the men they are interested in at the bar. It all explains why gay men are more visible than lesbians in this society. Some women can be closeted for years and maybe never ever coming out.

Case in point, it took Kelly McGillis (of Top Gun fame) 40 years and 2 marriages before finally deciding to come out. Imagine how popular she would be with the girls if she came out when she was still hot
I can understand why it took Kelly so long to come out. Despite being a product of nature, society does not accept gays as willingly as they should. It’s much better now as compared to the olden days but total acceptance is still a far-fetched reality. I read a true story in a magazine a few years ago about a gay man who married a woman so that he would appear normal. He tried his best to make it work. He refrained himself from going to “gay places” like the gyms or bars to resist the temptation. He would try to give excuses whenever his wife wanted it and if he couldn’t, he had to imagine himself making love to a man every time he had sexual intercourse with her. It became worse when his wife wanted a kid. He would force himself to “perform” every time his wife was ovulating and was so happy when his wife finally conceived. Once the baby was born, he used it as an excuse not to have sex with his wife saying the baby is distracting blah…blah…blah.
Normal? Yes.
Happy? Definitely not.
I pity him cos’ he has to go to that extent to be accepted. It’s his whole life we’re talking about here and not just a short stint as a straight man. Frankly, I don’t think he can pull it off in a long run. Personally, I do know of someone who’s also gay and married and is suffering now. Tried to lead a normal life (as defined by society) but it will come out eventually, as with all other closeted gay stories. But what kinda advice can you give to this person? “Leave your spouse and kids and go ahead, be true to yourself?” Life’s not as simple as that, unfortunately.

Another thing I remembered from that magazine article was the mention that some men who suffered from erectile dysfunction (ED) are actually gay. They are giving this excuse so that they do not have to have sex with their wife. The cure for this ED? No, not these blue pills. Just put a naked man in front of them and Voila!
Gays don’t have it easy. They have to strive to be accepted in society and at the same time struggle with their own inner self, trying to convince themselves that they’re normal. And what about those feelings of guilt in the eyes of God? Thus, I do applaud those people who dared and did come out despite what other people thinks. I hope they’re duly rewarded with the tranquility and happiness that only an open heart could bring. And I hope with this post, I’m able to change a few people’s perception of them. Accept them, cos’ they didn’t choose to be what they are, they’re born with it.
“I’m a supporter of gay rights. And not a closet supporter either. From the time I was a kid, I have never been able to understand attacks upon the gay community. There are so many qualities that make up a human being… by the time I get through with all the things that I really admire about people, what they do with their private parts is probably so low on the list that it is irrelevant.” ~ The late, great, Paul Newman













































